A Very Nerdy Birthday

I think my shameless love of The Orange Box is having an effect: today I received a package from the Valve Store containing a pair of bumper stickers and -- brace yourself -- a fucking Aperture Laboratories parking permit. All three of them are going on my car immediately; if only I had some variety of fish to complement WWGFD. Imagine that: a Gordon fish. Beating the Jesus fish and the Darwin fish both to death with a crowbar because Gordon Freeman doesn't have fucking time for your little fish-off.

The package came as a birthday present from the one and only Brad Rice, our features editor over at Destructoid and a hell of a guy. In one deft act he has been upgraded in my esteems from "angry barkeep with a heart of gold" to "snuggly bunny"; rest assured that the right papers have been filed to make the change official. Incidentally, this comes just days after receiving yet another Portaly gift: my very own weighted companion cube carved out of balsam wood by our video guru, Dan Lingen.

You guys are swell. I'm not used to getting presents on my birthday, if only because I tend to keep the event more or less low-key (aside from the occasional freak out about being old and irrelevant and whatnot). But I guess we've all grown quite close over the last year, right? When your birthdays roll around, keep an eye out on the mailboxes. I promise I'll try extra hard to send something that won't get you arrested.